I want to remind you all that read here that there are so many others who are suffering from so many illnesses. I have mentioned many here in this space, asking for you to include them in prayer as you pray for me. Some are family members, others are co-workers, and still others are members of our church family. It was brought to mind again to me today that we are called to lift each other up, to encourage and lessen each other's load as we are able. And since we cannot really ever understand fully the pain or suffering of another, we can only help by reaching out and listening to them, to truly enter into their life and listen to their heart. Then, and only then can we be of help to them.
I spent a few minutes on the phone with my cousin Joe this evening. Joe lives in Florida and has for many years battle a long list of ailments. At first, Crohn's afflicted him, and now he too has found out he has rectal cancer. He receives a scan every Monday, and the treatments are not going well for him as far as side effects go. He is left very fatigued, and in some pain which has left him unable to work at present. He is discouraged, but I believe he is trusting God. We talked tonight about God's perfect plan, and that all either of us want to be right now is in God's plan. I tried to encourage as best I could, trusting that God was giving me the things to say.
But it is tough. I said above that we have to really listen, to enter into a person's life, and hear their heart before we can ever begin to be of any help. I heard in Joe tonight some discouragement, but also a bit of peace. There is still longing, a longing that healing would come, that he would be restored to health, but also there is a testament that God is in control, and that he is still at work in his life, just as he is all round. Please lift up my cousin, asking God for his strength and peace to increase, and for his healing, so he is restored to good health.
Also, today for the first time in a long time I saw a young woman at church, Katie, who is also battling Crohn's and just recently has been released from the latest in a long line of hospital visits. Katie is soon to be married, so please continue to lift her, her fiance and their families to God during this time. Pray for her that this latest procedure will bring her relief, healing and ever increasing strength.
Next, please lift up my step-father, Bob. He has a problem in his rotator cuff, and is to undergo physical therapy for the next three weeks. He has had a cortisone shot, but he needs prayer for patience to go through the therapy to get his strength back. Bob is 88, and he is a fighter, but he is a little impatient and frustrated at not be able to do as he has done before.
Lastly, I want to ask for prayer for someone dear to Cynth and me. We have some things that will need saying, boundaries that will need to be laid, and it will be a tough time for us. But we need God's wisdom in how this is handled, so please pray that in this situation, God will reign and order this as he deems it to be.
In about nine hours I will have the first scan (CT) since beginning chemotherapy. Cynth and I have already commented that it would be great to see no sign of cancer anywhere where there previously have been. Realistically, I expect the scan to show that the chemo has had some effect. But what if it hasn't?
With the first indication that there was the probability of cancer surfaced on June 9, the mind raced with all the horrible things that most suspect would be prominent when facing such a diagnosis, anticipating even that all those things would be true for me. As we went through the many appointments that followed and learned more and more of what we should expect, despair over the treatments and the possibilities weighed on me at times. Yet, I have not experienced any of what I expected. To be sure, I have had other effects, and this has not been easy by any means. But God in his mercy has blessed me beyond my deserving. He continues to lead me daily, giving me good sleep, keeping my appetite up, and giving me cause and opportunity to praise his name.
If there is no change in the cancer as demonstrated by the scan, it won't change one thing for Cynth and me. We continue to trust in God from whom all blessings flow. He did not bring us this far to back away and leave us on our own. He does not sleep, nor does he slumber. He is above all, sovereign over all, even this trial in our lives right here, right now. For me to be discouraged is to take my eyes off of Jesus and focus on me, how unfair this is, how wrong it is. And that means that God then no longer holds the place in my heart that rightfully belongs to him. When he invaded my life nearly 41 years ago, his demand on me was the total indwelling of his Spirit. It has taken nearly this long to even begin to grasp what that might look like. But in every instance over the past 41 years, I see God's hand in my life. Cynth can see it in her life, too. And from before we wed, we often talked about the paths God had led us on, and now we see that all God has worked in us over the years, much of it while we fought against it, has brought us to this point, this moment that God has chosen for us.
It will not change one thing, if there is no change in the cancer. I will continue to praise my God and King, I will continue to trust him for his outcome in this. We have two more chemo treatments in this cycle, there may be radiation (in fact, it is probably likely, judging from what Felice's nurse said) and there may be other things still - Cynth is already armed with lots of questions about the possibilities to address the liver lesions.
So how can this be encouraging? God knows better than I what I need. And he loves me enough to have provided a way for my reconciliation with him, even when I acknowledged him not. And he has raised him who is my salvation to reign with him and my Lord intercedes for me daily. As I said early on in this walk, God is my strength. I will not fear. Sound simple? It is not. It is why we have coveted your prayers these many days. Like Moses needed someone to hold up his arms as the army of Israel fought in the desert, so we all need someone to hold us up to God. Perfectly, we have Jesus at God's right hand, but you all also, being part of the body of Christ, aid in intercession on my behalf, and on those whom I have mentioned to you.
Thanks be to God for all of you , your prayers, your thoughts, well wishes, and all the ways you care for others in the body. Remember to take the opportunity to share the hope in you when God presents it to you.
The Edwards Pot Roast and veggies was a big, big hit. The brownies didn't last too long, though.
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