Today we began Treatment #6. All the blood counts were good and the treatment thus far is going like the ones before. Today we also had Aaron over to our family doctor for a physical; he is wanting to resume working out, and it has been a while since his pre-football physical, so he wanted to get this physical and clear it with our doctor first.
We began seeing Dr Havens when Cynth wanted to find a doctor of osteopathy for working out the kinks in her back. While I was on active duty, I also took advantage of Dr Havens' unique training to realign my back on a few occasions. He is a little unorthodox, wearing jeans and cowboy boots, and not necessarily soft-spoken. Yet he spends whatever time you need to discuss everything from your presenting issue to other, more general life events. After I retired from active duty, I went to Dr Havens to keep up with my physicals. He had even mentioned that soon we would want to do a colonoscopy, especially as I approach 50.
Did I mention that Dr Havens keeps a unique syringe? It is about three inches in diameter, about six in he's long, all metal with a very crooked needle. It is used to joke with kids (some, not all), asking them if they need a "butt" shot. Dr Havens, a few years ago was in pretty bad shape. While clearing a fallen tree from the road in front of his house with his son after a violent storm, a driver under the influence clipped him, nearly severing his leg, as he pushed his son out of the way. Years later, Dr Havens would tell me that he hated to be giving us the news about the suspected disease on the liver.
Today, Dr Havens spent nearly thirty minutes after seeing Aaron just to talk with Cynth and me about the treatments and Mustangs. Cars, not horses. It seems he has a 1965 he has been working on for quite awhile. He was very pleased with the reports he had been receiving from Dr Felice. He told me I should work , if that is what I wanted to do, and he told me to get to work on my Mustang, because time is limited . . . for everyone, not just me. He kind of repeated Dr Felice, saying while "cure" is not in the vocabulary, remission is.
As we concluded our time, I said that we felt that this was a blessing. He asked "how so?" missing a unique opportunity, I talked about the nearly complete lack of side effects, even the fatigue since I can work and do pretty much everything I want or need to do. My missed opportunity was to tell him how us being here, and having him as our family doctor is a blessing for the care he demonstrates for our family, and his recommendations for doctors along this journey. I did say that we have seen God working through this at every turn. I wish I had said more.
That's often the way it is, trying to do something we feel led by God to do, wanting it to be successful for God, but failing in the attempt either saying too much, or too little, all the while thinking we've screwed it up. We must remember that we need only be obedient to God's call, leaving the results to God.
In 1975, the English art rock quartet of Graham Gouldman, Eric Stewart, Kevin Godley and Lol Creme (10cc),released their third album, The Original Soundtrack and the top single, "I'm Not In Love." I didn't care for it much then, but I've grown to like for it's several aspects. I began to like it, I believe, after a different line-up of 10cc released their sixth album in 1977, Deceptive Bends and "The Things We Do For Love," which used a similar technique as "I'm Not In Love." The synopsis of the latter song is the narrator repeating that he is not in love, but throughout the verses and by the end of the song he realizes that he is fooling himself.
When we have expectations of a successful outing trying to reach someone for Christ, we also are fooling ourselves. We need to acknowledge, that though God has called us to be his instruments, we are useful as the implement he accomplishes his work through. And what is his work? Redemption. Reconciliation. Restoration. Though we may not see the results, we get to help. And that is enough, so long as we trust in God's sovereignty and his provision of his Spirit to work in us and through us.
Yes. Dr Havens is a blessing, used by God for his purposes. At least in the case of this redeemed, adopted sinner, he blesses us by his care for us and the truth he is willing to speak to us. Pray with me that I, we, you will be such a blessing to others, speaking God's truth. God bless you to be such an instrument.
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