A Rainy Night in Viginia

I do love the Brooke Benton version of "Rainy Night in Georgia," having grown up listening to it since I was a young boy of eight. This pop singer from Lugoff, South Carolina had sixteen other top ten hits in addition to the come back "Rainy Night In Georgia," his last. I am not sure why the song is a favorite, but it does hold something for me. Maybe it the sound image of the "distant moanin' of a train" that "seems to play a sad refrain" reminds me of the trains that passed through Easley at night. Anyway, it is a favorite song of mine.

And so after last night's revelation that I am not as enamored mow as I once was with the lengthening days, I do admit to fondly anticipating warm rain showers. That is not what we are having at the moment, for the temperature is 42, but it feels like 39. So for the moment the warmth is generated by my nice mattress warmer, that I will soon turn off to curb the night sweats. A good day today, with occasional tingling in the hands, feet and backside. All in all a good second day.

Truly, even though I have had what I even said was a bad day at the time, in retrospect, I have to count each of the last 274 days since my diagnosis has been good, truly. For in each day, most especially on the days where I experienced my lowest points, were days in which God was so present. I learned afresh his love for me, exhibited by those praying for me at that precise moment, and for the power of my bride to speak truth in the face of her own struggles.

I've written often that this seems to me to be easier than I had expected. It isn't really. I do feel pretty good, and the effects I am experiencing, for the moment are minor irritants. But this illness is ever before me, and if I let my gaze fall from Christ and the path he is leading me on, I find my situation begins to loom larger and larger, an ever growing, fearsome thing.

And this is just me. I get little glimpses of how this is affecting Cynth in the things said and unsaid. I know it is worrisome, for this is the single biggest change to our life, maybe in the entire twenty plus years of our relationship. We've learned a new vocabulary,, become all too familiar with new surroundings, procedures, faces, and locations. And emotions. Fear is always chasing us, sometimes cloaked in discouragement, other times disguised as frustration, even hidden as doubt. Though it seems to be right around the next corner, we know beyond all doubt that God is bigger than this which we face.

Cynthia says to me, when I tell her I am sorry that I am taking her through this, that this is what she signed up for. Her way of saying that this is God's calling on her life. What she is affirming is God's design that brought us together, binding our hearts as one as he used us to encourage one another in love as we grew closer to him and closer to each other. And insee God's strength in Cynth renewed each day as she takes up the fight in all the many arenas she is active in.

This truly is her calling, one that she has been prepared for from eternity. We each have been prepared for this calling, in very uniquely different ways. What one experiences, the other also grew by, albeit from a different perspective. All part of the beauty of our union with each other and with Christ. Raised differently, experiencing love differently, knowing God differently, yet brought to salvation according to God's time and his design, and learning grace together. The calling as God's representative to each other is the foundation for all other callings of our lives.

As I post I am listening to the rain hit my window, and I am reminded of the duality of rain. It washes down the leftover Winter and brings nourishment for Spring. I am reminded also of the paradox of rain, for on the one hand it is seen as gloom and sadness, but simultaneously it is a blessing Of renewal. Life is like that too. In each of the seasons of life there is rain to bring blessing, even though itmay be with some degree of discomfort. Without it, we cannot be refreshed or grow, both necessary for our perseverance in this life. Keeping our focus on Christ, as Cynth encourages me and I her, is how we can see his provision of the rain in these storms. And we can say boldly, God is good, all the time.

Now we thank God for scrumptious Kyle BBQ sliders, cheesy potates, and broccoli Cole slaw topped off with cupcakes, and all the prayers from you all.